Many of us consider stopping at a yard sale to be a fun thing to do on the way home from shopping, or when you’re just out for a leisurely drive to nowhere. But there are other, very real reasons why people not only attend these outdoor junk-selling smorgasbords but have yard sales and garage sales of their own. One of the biggest reasons to attend a yard sale is to spend money to gather junk that you will then place in your attic or basement for about ten years so you can eventually get rid of it at your own yard sale. If you’re really lucky, you’ll sell it back to the same person who sold it to you, for a higher price.
“Oh, I used to have a sofa with a grease stain on the seat cushion and a bad spring that poked you in the tailbone every time you sat on it, that looked a lot like this one. My wife sold it about ten years ago, and I’ve always regretted getting rid of it. How much would you sell it for?” I would just love to drive home with the guy just to see the expression on the wife’s face.
Having a yard sale is one of the biggest commitments a person can make. I’ve seen wedding preparations that required less time and thought than those of an upcoming yard sale. You have to assemble the stuff to be sold, wash the dust, mold, spider webs, and gunk off it to make it presentable enough to be ignored, then slap a price on it. This is a step that requires some thought because too high a price will turn off the prospective buyer and too low a price, (except when it’s free) will make him think it’s broken.
Everything, and I do mean everything on sale must be tagged, unless it’s books or videos, in which case you can put them in a box with a generic price slapped on its side. People will still ask how much they are, but at least this way, the price is in plain view in nice big letters and numbers so that you can read it out to them from your lawn chair halfway across the yard. They will not figure it out for themselves. Be prepared to quote the same prices over and over again a thousand times a day. They will not buy anyway, but they love to hear the sound of your voice.
Carrying boxes of stuff out to your front yard or garage, is a challenge to break any back, or mind. Fifteen or twenty trips up and down the basement stairs is enough exercise for the average person, so you’ll get your daily workout and a bad attitude all at the same time. This is called, “multi-tasking”. Once you have your tables all set up and everything artfully arranged upon them, and the all-important sign parked beside the road, it will immediately begin to rain. You may think this is a problem but it’s not. It’s tradition and will not affect your sales in any way. Simply be prepared for the downpour. Get some large tarps and spread them over your stuff to keep it dry. The customers will climb in under the tarps and burrow through your wares at their leisure until the storm passes.
When the sale is over you will be gazing upon boxes of unsold stuff and the thought of carting it back to the attic or basement is already killing your spine. Don’t bother. Stuff it all into the trunk of your car and haul it off to Goodwill or Welfare. They will gladly take it, and pass it on to others, which is what you should have done in the first place.
