Clutter and Chaos

It all started as a little clutter. It just kept growing until it was total chaos. As I searched for the cure to what was ailing me, I found out about the FlyLady. That is when I first fully understood what the clutter had become. It was not just the simple chaos that I believed it was. Flylady.net website opened my eyes. FlyLady informed me that my clutter had turned into “Can't Have Anyone Over Syndrome” or CHAOS. Okay, it is true; my clutter was out of hand. But was this cute little fairy save me from my illness?

It all started quite simply. I have always had too much stuff. I was great at keeping it under control though. Slowly, it began growing. I moved several times and each time, there was another box that I just did not quite ever get to unpacking. Marriage brought yet another home full of stuff into my life. When we moved a larger home full of stuff into an already cramped smaller home full of stuff, it spiraled out of control.

I knew I had to get it under control. I just did not have a clue how. My dear sweet husband knew just how he would deal with it. Fortunately for my “stuff” I was tough and stood my ground as I fought for the right to keep it all. He continued to remind me that if I had not used it in six months, there was no need to keep it. Never mind the fact that he had a welding machine in his “shop” that went months without being used. Admittedly, it would cost considerably more to replace his welding machine than it would to replace my deviled egg platter or to wait and buy yarn at full price instead of stockpiling it for years on end just because it was on sale. Maybe, he was right. The clutter was out of control. Even I felt like I was being smothered by it all at times. Not to mention all the time it took to find something at times.

So, it was time to give in. I subscribed to the Flylady.net email list of reminders. With someone telling me to get off my behind and get it cleaned out, surely I could get control over the clutter and free my life and my home from the chaos of it all. Besides, it would be nice to be able to invite someone over without having to tell them to step high as they walked through the door. The success stories abound on the website. I am used to having lists of things to do since my mother used to give me one each week. I knew this would work!

What I did not take into consideration is that you have to be ready to change in order to change. I was not quite ready to change yet. I would make the toughest homeowner from the Style network Clean House show look like a beginner. No way could I get rid of my stuff. I did not form a habit of cleaning the clutter. My habit was moving the clutter and trying to hide it better. It cost too much to buy the items. I could not just toss it out or even give it away.

I knew that the only way I would gain control would be to use the TLC's Clean Sweep method. I needed to buy a lot of plastic and put everything out in the yard so I could see exactly what was smothering me. The only problem was that if I did that, then my husband would stand in the doorway and refuse to let me bring anything back in. No way could I allow that to happen. There had to be another alternative. Surely there was some way that I could get the clutter under control without having to waste my stuff. The only problem was would I find it in time?

I continued to watch every show of Clean Sweep and Clean House. I even read the emails from FlyLady. I kept dreaming that one day, I would find the solution. Slowly and surely, I began to realize that the problem was more than any one show or website could cure. Until I was ready to admit that I had a problem, it was not going to get better.

I took the take one thing at a time and just do it strategy from FlyLady. Then I added in her requirement that you maintained what you completed. After all, if you clean it and then let it get messed up again, then what good did you do? I never quite got the habit of keeping my sink shiny, but I did manage to adapt her maintenance requirement to work a bit for me.

Next, I added in the Clean Sweep sorting method on a much smaller scale. Instead of sorting it all out at one time, I used storage boxes and clothes baskets. By limiting the amount of stuff that I was sorting and distributing at a time, then it did not seem quite so overwhelming. True, it is taking much longer than the few days that they have for their television show.

Finally, I added Clean House's theory of getting rid of the foolishness. Yes, it was foolish to spend so much money on yarn when I wasn't ready to use it. The amount of money that I saved could never quite add up to the amount of stress that I had to deal with knowing that my house was not the way it should be. It was not the peaceful place that my family deserved. I knew that I had to get to the point of giving them the home that they deserved.

By combining parts from the two television shows and the website and email list, I found my own cure. I still have a bit of clutter, but it is getting under control each and every day. I am turning the yarn into the items that are slowly and surely being shipped out to where it can be sent out to help others. Items that are no longer being used are leaving. Shh, don't tell my husband. He would think it was all his idea. Those items that I rarely use are slowly and surely going away. Instead of holding on to the clutter, I am holding onto my family. They are the important thing. The rest is all just stuff.

Now that I have found my way to being ready for change, I was able to find my way to change. Although there are many methods that have worked for many people, I had to find my own way. The important thing is that regardless of how it is being done, it is being done. Chaos is turning back into just clutter. One day soon, the clutter will be gone. In its place will be the home that my family deserves.