Most of my entries lately have been about my Parkinson's surgery. I am writing this to show that life at our house is not all about me and my health problems. Having a mom who is recovering from surgery has not stopped the insanity of sibling rivalry. Is there anything that will?
I grew up with one sister, sixteen months older than I am, and my parents tried hard to give us equal amounts of everything. I recall a time when a neighbour child gave my sister half of a Popsicle, and she wouldn't let me have a lick. I went home to complain, and my dad gave me a dime to go to the corner store and buy my very own Popsicle. I got to have both halves, plus keep the 3¢ change! (That's a bit of a clue as to how old I am!). We used to have to share everything. Since I was the younger, I had the additional hardship of wearing her hand-me-downs, which were usually already handed down from an older cousin, so I felt doubly sorry for myself.
My two daughters are twenty-seven months apart. Munchkinette Number the First One seemed to have been born without the gene for sharing, so I was a bit concerned when Munchkinette Number the Next One was born with a sweet, sunny disposition and an extra helping of generosity. I thought that the older sister would take advantage, and did she ever! For the first couple of years, the sharing all went one way, and I kept warning my elder Pretty Princess that if she didn't start to reciprocate, her little sister might start to imitate her stingy ways. I hate it when I am so very right!
I knew we were in for trouble when Pretty Princess the younger learned how to count. She had plenty of motivation to learn. When I gave them Smarties, for example, they had to count them, and there was outrage if one sister had more than the other. You would think that they were starving to death, and those candies were the last bits of food in the house. They also fight over clothes, toys, books, and pretty much everything that there are not two identical items of. Actually, I recall two identical Barbies that for some reason they were fighting over…
Slight change of topic. We sponsor a Compassion Child from Kenya. There are three children in her family, so I was curious to know how sponsorship works out if only the oldest sibling in the family is sponsored. I called the office and asked. Turns out that when children are in genuine need, they are much more generous. The aid worker told me of a time when one child received a package of pencils, and she was so excited that she broke them into bits and gave the pieces to her family and friends. I've also heard that starving children in feeding stations will not finish the food they are given because they want to take some home to their families.
So.. does the solution to the constant squabbling in my family start with moving to a Third World country where my children would learn some gratitude. There must be some hope here. My sister and I don't fight anymore, although we do have a bit of greener grass syndrome. She thinks that I am fortunate to have a wonderful husband and children who, despite all my ranting really are quite precious, especially when they are asleep. I think that she is fortunate to have the freedom to travel, and no one to depend on her. Let's see…only four more years until my eldest is in college…
I am told that my children are normal. Actually I got to observe sibling rivalry in spades during my teaching career. In my first year, I had a multigrade classroom with three sets of siblings. I couldn't separate them far enough to stop the requisite punch on the shoulder whenever one would walk past a brother or sister. I didn't realize how much worse they were at home, though I should have gotten a clue when one girl told me that she and her brother were fighting so much last night that her mom ran away from home. I understood completely when I had two children of my own. Fortunately, we lived in the country, so I had the freedom to go outside and scream.
We had a girl billeting with us during volleyball season. I asked her one day what her family was like, and she informed me that she does all of the chores at home, while her brother and sister get away with everything and they get way more stuff than she does. In other words, a normal family.
Why do my girls have to be so normal?
