Being single and a mother is not an easy task. Women are opted no choice when it comes to mothering children. Whether you like it or not, you are a woman and it is your role to be the mother, even if you are single. And being single with a child needs so much guts in order to fight your way out.
As a single mother, one must take into consideration the benefit of the child. Although women are given the option to marry or not to marry, children are left to suffer the consequences of having no father, if the woman chooses not to marry but wants a child of her own. Women should therefore decide being a single mother only if they are sure they will let their children accept and understand the situation they have to undergo in the absence of the father.
I was thirty when I had my son. It was my choice not to marry as I only wanted a child of my own. But when the father of my son left, it was then that I realized the mistake I had chosen. Being a single mother is no fun at all. I had my share of the ups and downs of life in the absence of a husband who is there comes problems. It was such a topsy-turvy life that we were in with my son and it is hard to sort it out.
Too much had come my way with my son as I tried to make ends meet and gave him what he needed. My job as a teacher provided us with everything we needed but I couldn't accept the situation that my son was growing up everyday with no father to call “Daddy.” I had sleepless nights coupled with tears that left me effortless the next day. I lost a lot of weight and became so thin while battling with the pain that I had created in me. I didn't blame anyone for what happened because I was the one who planned my life and I was too old to be putting the blame into the hands of anyone.
Being a single mother demands maximum tolerance and the knack to handle different and tricky situations of being a mother. Being a wife and being a single mother are two different things. A wife has a husband to turn to when she is put into a difficult situation. A single mother on the other hand, whether she likes it or not is alone in deciding, planning and raising her child. She has to have a good job in order to provide for her child. She has no one to lean on when problems occur. And worst, she has to bear the consequences of being often asked where her husband is.
Before you put yourself into the situation, here are some facts that I would like to share being a single mother for seventeen years.
First, weigh the pros and cons of being a single mother. You have to make sure that you will accept the situation that you are putting yourself into. Second, think of your child's situation without a father. Will he accept his situation when the right time comes? Third, put yourself into a situation when you cannot provide well for your child. Will you let your child suffer the consequences of having no father? Keep in mind that your decision will greatly affect your future and your child's.
