Do not break your promises
One of the easiest ways to lose the trust of your kids and damage the love connection is to break our promises or in simplest terms, lie. Sometimes things just happen and we're unable to live up to those promises. That's life. We can't get around it. But what about the times when we make promises that we have no intentions of keeping? What about the promises we haven't truly thought out? That's where we need our focus at. These are the lies.
Show affection
Showing affection is one of the easiest ways we can show our kids we love them. No matter how we were brought up or what is going on in our life, chances are, our kids did not put us in those situations. We must take the time to hug our kids and tell them we love them. Do not assume they know.
Do not get them everything they want, but ensure that they have everything they need
I know we all as parents want our kids' lives to be better than our own, but that does not mean that we have to get them everything they want to make their lives better. It may make it more entertaining, but not better. Kids want things and can make you feel like dirt if you don't get it for them, but they would rather know that you will be there for them whenever they need you. The key word is need.
Show an interest in their successes
We will not be interested in everything our kids are interested in, but we must be interested in our kid's successes. Remember back to their first step or their first word. We must think of how we reacted at those moments the next time our kids conquer a new level on their video game or when they score a 100 on there social studies mid-term. We must remember, these are their successes and we should continue to support them.
Show an interest in their failures
We must also take an interest in our kids' failures. Help them to understand that failure is actually a success. They have learned a way, not to do something. This is also known as experience. We must help them to understand that the only true failure is when you stop trying to succeed.
Remember when you were a kid
As we grow up and experience things, we as adults have a different view of things than we did when we were kids. We have to remember that our kids are kids. They have not experienced some of the things that we have. Some things in life, you just have to experience to get it.
Help them make decisions
It is our job to be advisors to our kids. We must advise them on what is right and wrong (by our experiences) and know that only they can make the decision for their lives. As much as we may want to save them from some bad experience, we can't. We can arm them with the tools they will need to make sound choices when faced with decisions.
Prepare them for life
Life is unforgiving and cruel and beautiful and wonderful. Life is not always what you make it, but the decisions you make will have an effect. We must prepare our kids for life. Not just by stressing good grades, but by preparing them for life. Don't get them everything they want. Let them know that they will fail at more things than they succeed in. But also let them know that those little failures can equate to large successes. Talk to them about money and credit. Talk to them about drugs and sex. Talk to them about death. Prepare your kids for life.
Love them unconditionally
Love your kids no matter what. If you were a jock in high school and your kid wants to join the band; show your love by supporting them. You may encourage your kids to play sports, because genetically it's in the family, but if they decide it's not for them, support them. Give them what they need to succeed. Love them unconditionally.
