I was almost thinking of myself as an expert on the subject of mothers and daughters because I have read so many books on the subject of relationships between mothers and daughters. That is until recently and I did say almost because "let me tell you, I am not an expert". I am feeling rather apprehensive with Easter and Mother's Day fast approaching because my daughter is not speaking to me at all. This of course bothers me very much. It started two weeks before "Thanksgiving", you know the holiday when we should all be appreciating our friends and family! Well, we were invited to my daughter's for a sit down turkey dinner, but my husband feeling kind of tired declined saying he wanted to stay home, watch football and relax this year. On other Thanksgivings, we would go to my daughter's and son-in-law's house to enjoy great food and lively chatter with all of our family.
I have heard emotions can run high before the holidays with many people. And, I am wondering if my husband and I maybe did not respond correctly to my daughter's invitation? Should I have said to my husband "this is an important family holiday and we should go?" She has expressed herself to her siblings telling them that she was extremely "hurt" and wanted to know what had she done to us? We did assure her over and over that she had done absolutely nothing wrong. Possibly I have unwittingly passed on some strange emotional stress genes to her that causes the over importance of holidays!
Thanksgiving 2007 has come and gone, now this is February! Valentine's Day has passed and still we have not heard from her. We miss her very much. Is it possible that extreme let downs real or imagined occur during holiday seasons? I am perplexed. Maybe too much is made of holidays aftter all, I don't have an answer.
I wanted to share this experience with other Mothers and daughters hoping that Mother's Day this year for them will have a special meaning. Maybe my daughter will read this and rethink our relationship. Possibly make a phone call or send a card on that special day in May and a say a few nice words too.
