It could happen to you, too! The most important thing to remember is that Mommies were raising babies long before there was DHA in formula, $200 video monitors, organic baby bedding, humidifiers and mobiles etc. . . When all that matters is getting your baby to sleep through the night, try and remember to focus on what baby needs without letting baby take over your life.
Babies, actually all humans, have five basic needs: comfort, hunger, sleep, routine and, of course, love. Of course, as adults, our needs are generally much more complicated and varied however, at the core, that's pretty much it. So, as parents, what we need to do is take a step inside those precious little brains and figure out how to fulfill those needs in a way that provides satisfaction.
In order to fulfill baby's needs, we have to have our own grown up list . We must be confident, patient, flexible and loving.
The first night home from the hospital is a blur of oh-my-gosh, the hospital thought we could actually take care of a baby by ourselves?!?!? What were they thinking? My husband and I decided we would take turns but, we both woke up everytime our son did that evening. Of course, we couldn't do that every day so, we had to figure out a way to help our little guy sleep. And so begins every new parents' struggle. What I have come to understand after surviving two newborns can be applied that first night home as well as the first time sleeping in a toddler bed (at least it has been with my toddler!)
The first thing I learned was the importance of proactivity. As anyone from a football coach to a police officer will tell you, you must strategize, you must anticipate. Okay, so what can we anticipate? Baby wouldn't have woken up if baby wasn't uncomfortable in some way. I always went for the diaper change first because newborns tend to fall asleep when eating so, why disturb them?
As baby gets older, of course, notice baby's reaction to the temperature in the room. Also note what kind of cry it is. When my toddler wakes up in the middle of the night from a scary dream, the cry is sudden and sharp. It is then usually followed by a moan and a mumble, then it's back off to dreamland. When he started waking up scared, we anticipated the problem the next night by buying him a big, ugly looking horned stuffed wart hog with spiky hair that we named Spike. We told our toddler that Spike will sit on the edge of his bed and keep all the scary things away. Paulie hasn't woken up scared since. We anticipated that the problem would keep happening until we found a way to prevent it. When Paulie's teething was at its peak, he would have a more shrill cry that would keep going, no real undulation, similar to his pain not easing.
Fussy usually means too cold for my 5 month old daughter. Blankets, of course, should not be used until baby is at least two years old because of strangulation and/or suffocation risks. Swaddling while sleeping is, of course, acceptable however, the new regulations advise that arms shall be free. Bumpers were thought a great idea however, they too offer the possibility of suffocation if baby rolls onto the side. Since positioners are no longer thought to be necessary, this may happen. Since blankets are out, many jump to turn up the heat. You really don't want the baby's room much warmer than you would like your room when you sleep. Excessive heat increases baby's risk for SIDS. Experts now link SIDS to sleep apnea and feel that if the baby is too warm and too cozy, baby's body may not alert it if there is a lapse in breathing. If this is a concern to you, you may want to check out the baby monitors that actually monitor the baby's movement. An alert tone sounds if baby stops moving for more than twenty seconds. It has allowed me countless sleep filled, worry free (ish) nights! As far as the cold is concerned, the blanket sleeper have always worked fine for my little ones.
After the diaper change, I always went next to food. The trick with newborns is to remember that they don't necessarily know what is best for them. They can typically indicate it to you but, they don't always know. So, just because baby falls asleep doesn't mean that baby is finished eating. Just simply nudge the nipple (yours or the bottle's) or tickle those little feet or remove a layer of clothing (strip to diaper if necessary, to make sure baby's belly actually gets its fill. Then, back to comfort, make sure you burp baby. Many new parents are afraid to hurt baby so they tap. You need to put a little force into it, baby won't break, honest!
