Busy, stressful lives usually mean stressed out people. Bring public places, stressed out parents and unruly or grouchy children together, and things can get out of hand rather quickly. Now, Project Wakanheza is making headway into defusing these potentially explosive or abusive situations.
Until recently, I hadn't heard of Wakanheza or the Wakanheza Project. But, living in Minnesota where the Wakanheza Project was developed and is gaining momentum, I couldn't help but eventually run across the term. Even though I'd heard local child protection and school officials talk about "Wakanheza," it wasn't until I saw a television special about the project that I took it upon myself to learn more.
In a society that finds fewer children being seen and not heard, most of us have witnessed a frazzled parent trying to deal with a child behaving badly in public places. Grocery stores, restaurants and anywhere there's a waiting line are prime locations. Whether children are tired, hungry or just throwing an old fashioned tantrum, such behaviors are difficult for parents, especially when disapproving looks and critical comments from bystanders are added to the mix. When that occurs, parents often feel shamed or humiliated by their child's behavior, which can quickly cause a situation to escalate and even result in abuse, either on the spot or when out of the public's scornful eye.
That's where the Wakanheza Project comes in. Wakanheza is the Dakota Indian name for child; the English translation is sacred being. The overall concept is to teach people when and how to reach out and help - without judgment or scorn - when a meltdown between parent and child is in progress. The basic principles are to distract and redirect, offer assurance, show empathy and avoid judging.
In the American culture, minding one's own business and not getting involved tend to be the rules of thumb. But the Wakanheza Project is proving there is a better way, whether it involves a screaming toddler, a preschooler or a harried, tired parent with three little kids all vying for attention.
Wakanheza training teaches individuals tools and ways to effectively respond to such scenarios. An example of how Wakanheza works occurred in a Minnesota Famous Dave's restaurant recently. My 17-year-old niece is employed there and works with a "Wakanheza-trained" assistant manager. A 3-year-old was screaming, refusing to eat and just generally disrupting patrons on every side. The family had just begun eating, were not inclined to leave their food, but were unable to quiet their son. Tensions were rising. Quick as could be, the assistant manager approached the table with balloons that she playfully inflated and bent and twisted in various animals shapes. She then added some colored markers to draw eyes, ears and noses. In just seconds a tense situation was defused for everyone. In addition, the manner in which it was done caused no one to feel embarrassed, shamed or otherwise uncomfortable. According to my niece, "the whole thing was so cool."
Likely Page BreakIn terms of the overall community, the Wakanheza Project is working to teach businesses and agencies the importance of creating welcoming environments for families and individuals with children. For example, libraries with family-oriented computer areas are proving worthwhile. Imagine a single parent with a toddler - or two - completing an online job application at a public library. Sounds like disaster to me. But put that computer into a separate family area with children's books, toys and tables and chairs for kids, and the scene is completely different.
By necessity, child welfare agencies are here to respond to child abuse, not prevent it. The Wakanheza project focuses on prevention by involving individuals and the community.
Don Gault, the founder of the Wakanheza Project, is employed by the St. Paul-Ramsey County (Minn.) Dept. of Public Health. In addition to providing training for individuals who work in public places, Gault and his colleagues are on a public awareness campaign by way of free posters and brochures made available to local social service agencies, schools, police departments, libraries and healthcare facilities. Training for individuals takes one to four hours and includes discussions on parenting and discipline, exercises about children's behavior in public and tips and suggestions for intervening when a parent-child meltdown is looming.
Not everyone is comfortable approaching a tense parent-child situation. But in companies like grocery stores and restaurants, where these kinds of incidents are common, the Wakanheza Project is making headway in getting employees trained. The benefit to everyone may well be immeasurable, and I am proud to live in the state where such an innovative concept originated.
