There must be instruction in duty, concrete in¬struction, for the child lives in the world of his senses, not in the abstract ideas. The basis of true moral character must be laid in obedience. The child must learn that above him and around him there is law and that law is absolute and for his good. This is nature's way of teaching. Authority is external at first, but to be of any worth obedience must be from motives that make for character. External force or fear may restrain from wrongdoing but the habit of such obedience is destructive to nobility of character. Love and a high sense of duty are far more com¬manding. They win the whole nature.
It is also a fact never to be ignored that moral training is not incidental, to receive now and then a spurt of effort. It is a central and vital function. In¬struction must be constant in the atmosphere of the home, in the spirit of the school, in the frequent word of instruction or criticism. Ignorance is not the mother of virtue. Line upon line, precept upon pre¬cept, is as necessary for the children of today as for the children of that long ago when Solomon was the great teacher. Wise guidance the child must have during those early years "when he is making his first reactions to the great world of stimuli—physical, social and religious.'' But this guidance should never take the form of irritating commands or of ceaseless nagging, neither should the voice of authority be loud and harsh. The companionable parent makes the com¬panionable child. It is a happy home where parents and children talk with each other, not at each other.
The most effective method in discipline is positive rather than negative. Love has stronger mastery than fear. The expulsive power of a good idea cannot be measured. There is that dramatic story of legions of devils entering the herd of swine, tearing and rend¬ing them in the country of the Gadarenes. Taking the swine as the symbol of the unfilled mind that is to be directed, what a pity it was that good spirits had not first entered and taken possession of the swine before the evil spirits found them empty. High ideals, noble endeavors, leave no room for evil imaginings. Good habits of life and thought come to us as di¬rectly through unconscious processes as through di¬rect teaching, yes, even more direct, for the in¬fluence of environment is constant.
Power through suggestion of a noble personality is beyond all other teaching. " If a teacher have mind and heart large enough, his life becomes a tremendous suggestion every hour that he is in contact with his pupils," says Dr. George Dawson. This is equally true of parents. They constantly teach and discipline by what they are. And, alas, immoral attitudes are equally suggestive as teachers. "The mother who forever worries, grieves, fears, scolds, raves, fattens on scandal, must induce depraved states in the minds of the children growing up about her through the potency of suggestion. Is it to be wondered at if her children grow up into selfish, jealous, narrow, un¬charitable beings, when such qualities have been im¬pressed upon their intellects through all their forma¬tive years?" Such is the description of the destruc¬tive influence of an unworthy mother. Glorious be¬side it is the picture of the honored mother found in the book of Proverbs. As the crowning glory of her work, "Her children rise up and call her blessed," says the written word and it might truthfully be added, "And they shall be like unto her."
The discipline of the home belongs only half to the mother. The father who, by badness of life or unreasonableness of temper, puts before his boys an unworthy example, is destructive of character and alas! alas! too often the evil that he does lives after him. Whereas the father who lives nobly needs no higher honor than the sons who succeed him. It is true and we must believe it, for the optimism that it puts into life, that good habits of life are helped as truly by good companionship as they are hindered by bad.
In the application of convincing truths it is good sometimes to illustrate by familiar, oft recurring ex¬amples. Acts of constructive and of destructive dis¬cipline are both as familiar in our every-day life as the exterior of the houses upon our street. One laughs at the hypothetical mother who warned her children not to put beans in their noses and it is not hard to understand the psychology of the fact that she found their noses stuffed with beans when she returned home. Said a young mother to her little girl, "Now you have on a clean dress and I shall punish you by putting you to bed if you get it dirty." Said another mother to her child, "Now you are my clean little lady and father will be so glad to see you so clean when he comes home." It is easy to see which mother was constructive and which destructive.
A mother sat sewing and the child of four was playing near. As she touched the scissors or the thread or cloth or leaned on mother's shoulder or against the sewing machine, the querulous voice ex¬claimed, "No, no, Judith must not do that." And with equal sharpness the child's voice exclaimed, "Me must do sumfin." Sad, turbulent current of rebellion stirred by negative commands. If only the mother had found employment for those little fingers and turned the emotional currents into the joy of imita-"tion! Christina Rossetti's advice is good for every day practice:
Seldom can't.
Seldom don't.
Never shan't.
Never won't.
Two boys in different schools were heard uttering oaths on the school ground. The teacher of one called the boy up before the school and whipped him. The angry boy waited only, to be out of hearing then swore in deeper profanity than before because it was an angry oath. The teacher of the other boy talked with him in such a way that he regretted the offense and thought it reasonable when, for punishment, he was forbidden the privileges of the playground. Both boys were punished, but one boy was made bitter and rebellious by his punishment. The second boy was convinced of wrong and resolved to overcome his fault.
It has been well said that "to teach a child con¬tinuously what is right without securing in some way corresponding connections with right conduct is to make the child oblivious to such relations.'' He must learn by the law of consequence. Bad impulses must be followed by corresponding results, good impulses by satisfaction.
The absoluteness of moral law, hence the obligation to obedience, must be fundamental in all instruction. Knowledge of what is right and a growing disposition to do what is right, these are constructive principles that must underlie all our ends and aims in discipline.
