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Being One of Several Children is Better Then Being an Only Child

A perspective on the old debate of Which is Better?: Only Child or One of Many?

Being one of several children in a family is better than being an only child. You learn many life skills that you wouldn't be able to learn otherwise, skills such as responsibility, interdependence, sharing, and stronger social skills. Being an only child may have short-term benefits, such as more room and attention, but in the long run it is better to be one of several children.

In a family of four children I've learned to be responsible for and take care of my siblings. Responsibility is a skill you will most definitely learn in big family. You learn how to be responsible earlier and it becomes second nature to you. By the time you have your own family you will know the very essence of responsibility. This is opposed to an only child who doesn't know how to be responsible for any other person. By the time he gets to have a family, he is just learning how to be responsible for others and take care of his family.

When your family has many children you learn another valuable skill, that is interdependence. You depend on your siblings to comfort you, help you, stand beside you, play with you, take care of you, and even clean up after you as they depend on you. An only child depends only on themselves and their parents. They do not have a brother to play with them or a sister to comfort them. They learn independence, they may even learn to be dependent on someone else, but they do not learn mutual dependence. They do not experience what it's like to have someone depend on them. This is an important skill to learn if you plan on having your own family in the future.

To be part of large family, you must learn to share. Most families' harmony depends on how well it's members share. For instance, two children might have to share a room. If the two can never agree, always argue and cause conflict, then the family's harmony is compromised. If the two can agree, and avoid conflict and arguments, then the family's harmony is in balance. If the two children manage the latter then they have learned the valuable skill of sharing. An only child cannot learn this skill as easily as others. Growing up they do not have to share toys, food, or room with anyone. They are not forced to practice sharing on a regular basis and so they do not learn it.

Being part of a large family you also gain stronger social skills then you would being an only child. With so many different personalities in one house you learn how to converse with those different people without causing conflict, a useful tool in the real world. An only child has no one they can use to gain strong social skills. All of their skills they must learn from outside sources, and not on a regular basis.

But being one of several children isn't all about the skills you learn, its about having a large family full of people who know you, care for you, and love you no matter what. You learn valuable skills from one another but you also learn the most valuable skill of all. How to care for one another unconditionally. An only child may have lots of friends, but they come and go.

So, in conclusion, I believe it is better to be one of several children then an only child. You learn valuable skills, and get to experience life in a big family with lots of people who love you. That, to me, is better then having a big room to yourself, and never having to share anything any day.

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