When we were asked to take in our new foster son's a few months ago, my husband and I agreed with open arms. We both assumed that I would take a week off from work to get us all settled into a new routine and then get right back to work. This is the format that had worked for us in a previous foster placement and also the pre-adoptive placement of our 5-year old daughter. Piece of cake I thought to myself, and then I started making calls to find a daycare that had openings for an infant and a three year old who was not potty-trained. I must have called dozens of home daycares and daycare centers and most could take one or the other, but none had the room for both. So, I extended my leave from work and stayed home with the boys. We kept our daughter in daycare before and after school so as not to lose her place if the boys were only here for the short term and I became a stay at home mom.
After about a month or so of my being home I decided that since I wasn't all that thrilled with my job in the first place I would become a stay at home mom and concentrate on my career as a novelist. I surely am a stay at home mom now, we even stopped the before and after care for our 5-year old. She started taking the bus from home just the other day and that was hard enough. The bus cruised right past her on the morning run, after being 20 minutes late, and in the afternoon it was pouring rain so the boys and I were standing out there for roughly 10 minutes before I had the brains to go back to the house 30 yards away and get us all loaded into the car.
Let me tell you that I always thought that being a stay at home mom was all peaches and cream. Honestly, I thought I was going to be the new Peggy Bundy, without the huge red hair and hot pants; or I was going to be one of those well put together mom's who was out lunching with friends and shopping at the mall all day. I can honestly tell you that none of the above has happened. I have not become Peggy Bundy, I haven't even eaten one bon-bon, and I am not at all well put together. As a matter of fact, most days I am luck to find the time to take a quick shower. I am sure that I am going to forget how to put on make-up.
My future career as a novelist is in jeopardy for two very important reasons; the first being my three year old doesn't give me one second of peace during the day, and the second because I can't find an agent to publish my wonderful, completed manuscript.
So, not only am I not Peggy Bundy, but I am not on the New York Times Best Seller's list, both are things that I aspire for.
My husband thinks I should keep the house clean and have dinner cooked every night, I think he is crazy because after taking care of the two boys all day I am luck to be able to keep my eyes open until the 10 o'clock news starts. Most nights I don't, I end up falling asleep on the couch and only wake up when my loving husband tells me it is time for bed and I insist that I wasn't sleeping in the first place.
For better or for worse I am a stay at home mom, now I just need to figure out how Peg Bundy got all her chores done and managed to take care of her kids too.
