This proverb received a lot of negative attention in the aftermath of Hillary Clinton's book by that name. I have never had a problem with this idea. Most of the resentment and criticism when the book hit the market had more to do with public sentiment about the author than the title or premise. Because of Mrs. Clinton's tendency to polarize people while her husband was president, the book probably never got a fair reading by most conservatives.
Parents have always known that raising a child takes more work than parents can do on their own. In order to connect a child with his or her heritage, associations with the extended family are critical. Without developing relationships with grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins, it is easy to lose family continuity. Most people understand that it is easier to know where you are going if you know where you came from.
Our extended family gives us a sense of belonging that strangers in the world can never match. This idea of having a place where you are accepted in the world means a lot when children and adolescents are building there self-identity and self-esteem.
Even the cranky and mean people have a place in young lives. As we grow, a certain amount of toughness has to be developed to cope with the adversity that everyone eventually faces. To make potatoes be able to ship without becoming bruised and damaged, the vines are beaten down about a week or two ahead of the harvest. During this time, the potato no longer receives fresh moisture to keep it supple.
The lack of moisture toughens the skin so the potato can be shipped safely to the market. This does not hurt the potato. In the long run, it improves it. The same is true of childhood adversity. As long as it is not allowed to get out of control, it does not damage the child. It creates inner strength to use as an adult.
Children need to learn. In our society, most of this is done by professional teachers. Even in home school situations, outside talent is often used for physical education and fine arts. Parents may take their children to museums, zoos, and amusement parks, but someone else runs them and makes sure they are available when we need them.
Farmers grow the food that we feed to our children. The grocer provides the space to allow us to shop for our food and other items. Municipalities and utilities provide our homes with the necessities to keep it warm and safe. Very few of us make our own clothing. Even if we do, few still weave our own cloth. For the few that might even do this, their thread is provided by others.
It takes far more than parents to raise that child. Everywhere we look new influences and suppliers are found that assist parents in this formidable task. Parents are primary, but the village must step up for children to be raised with proper values and an understanding of the world around them.
