You see, Dr. Mom, is a control freak, she controls every minute of her husbands and children's time when she is home, and believes everything in the home, family and marriage is hers because she has the larger income. I guess having a father who cares for every ounce of your children's needs should be free. Now let me also give you some background about Dr. Mom. Since the divorce she has cut off John financially, he has had to live off credit cards and she has even made him ask for food in the house in front of the children. She has also been hiding money, sending cash in 9K increments to her family so they won't have to claim it on their taxes as income, removed personal belongings from the home, stole Johns computer, I could go and on, but I think you get the idea. On the other hand, John is a passive man, and is getting completely steam rolled, mostly because he doesn't want to do things to the “mother of his children” in retribution and barely even defends himself.
His attorney then warned John, that since a custody study would be costly (around 50K) that Dr. Mom might accuse him of abuse or other allegations to obtain custody of their kids, by the cheapest means possible. Well finally last week, that exact thing happened. John came home and the kids were gone and so was the wife. Dr. Mom, tried to get an “order for protection” but since she had no evidence that abuse ever occurred (you would laugh if you knew John) they gave her a “no contact order” she was the one who was suppose to leave the home, and then show up for court the next day. Well, in spite of that, she convinced the police it was a “order for protection” and even snowballed the courts the next day. John was removed from the home and has been in a hotel ever since. Even the following day when the courts discovered their error and Dr. Mom got a slap on the wrist, since he was already out of the home, they decided to keep it that way. Here is the worst part. Even the county's child protection officer, was going to testify on Johns behalf that he is the main caregiver of the children and that what Dr. Mom did was harmful, he still has to be out of the house. This is a man with no job, living off credit cards. He was given $2000 to find a 3-bedroom apartment or town home that he has to get in place before he can get his portion of visitation started. Then, they ordered Dr. Mom, who could have easily moved out of the home with plenty of money to spare, to pay $2500 in child support a month. This may sound like allot, but lets put the shoe on the other foot. Would a stay at home mom, EVER be put out of her home and made to live off of $2500 bucks a month as her sole income? Rent alone for a 3 bedroom (they have 2 boys and 1 girl) will run anywhere from 1100 to 1300 dollars a month. Then the cost of utilities and food for children on a half time basis, and if he finds a job he will have to find childcare before and after school, but one that can pick up/ or drop off from a private school because of the bussing situation. Please bear in mind this Dr. Mom is making in the range of $422,000 to $500,000 a year. If my calculations are correct the amount of child support to a stay at home mom, even with split custody would be in the range of $4,000 dollars a month not to mention that after 15 years of marriage and your whole life evolving around your doctor spouse, wouldn't maintenance also be involved. I checked out New York law and there is a stipulation for emergency child support and maintenance. It also says that it should be unbiased according to gender, but it is clearly not here. This unemployed, stay at home dad is now living in a hotel, looking for a place to live, quickly so he can see his children who are missing him severely, and being cared for by nannies and a visiting grandma.
If “John” were a woman, you know the DOCTOR would have been the one to move out, would have been paying a fair share of alimony and support and the kids would be seeing both parents equally. But that is not the case here. This is blatant case of discrimination and it is an outrage!
If any of you dads out there in this area read this. Please feel free to send it on to others. Send it on to the newspapers or anyone in the press in that area. I find this to be a great human-interest story and it seems to be a very un-acceptable bias against men. Men who actually want to be involved in their children's lives and in this mans case has been stripped of being the main caregiver of his children, solely because of his gender.
Please do me a favor and spread the word; this type of discrimination is unacceptable.
