If you hope to ever be successful in a career, you’re going to have to impress someone over a meal at some point, and without proper etiquette, you’ll see the opportunities fly past you at an alarming rate. So if your mother didn’t drill it into at a young age, you’d better read on, and keep your elbows off the table.
Doesn't it just bring to mind nagging mothers and uptight aunts at Thanksgiving dinner? Table manners are fast becoming a custom of the ancient world, replaced by fast food take out eaten in the car, and microwavable pizza pockets in front of the TV. But if you hope to ever be successful in a career, you're going to have to impress someone over a meal at some point, and without proper etiquette, you'll see the opportunities fly past you at an alarming rate. So if your mother didn't drill it into at a young age, you'd better read on, and keep your elbows off the table!
General Table Behaviour
Don't sit on the edge of your chair; pull it in and sit back.
Sit up straight and keep your hands in your lap when you're not using them.
Wait until everyone is served before you begin eating.
Converse with other guests, but don't monopolize the conversation.
Don't talk with your mouth full.
Don't reach in front of anyone to pick up something across the table.
Don't wave your cutlery or glassware for emphasis; you wouldn't want to wing someone with a morsel of beef.
Don't tap your silverware on the plate or glassware.
Don't blow on food noisily to cool it.
Don't make slurping, smacking, gulping, or other unnecessary noises while eating.
Do not spit out food you find unsuitable to eat, either into a napkin on onto a spoon.
If you are attending a meal at someone's house, do not complain about the food, or declare your dislike of it - your host or hostess will find it insulting.
If you begin to cough after taking a drink or a piece of food goes down the wrong way,” leave the table and come back when you are composed again.
Use of Cutlery
Wherever possible, food should be eaten with a fork only. It is much better to use the side of your fork to cut soft food into edible pieces than to use the knife, if you can.
When you must, hold the knife in your right hand and the fork in your left, cut a few pieces and then switch the fork to your right hand and put down your knife to eat them.
Do not cut up all your food at once before eating it; cut several pieces at a time.
Never set your cutlery on the table or tablecloth, always place it on your plate when not in use.
Never use a knife for any purpose except cutting food; do not use it to spear morsels and bring them to your mouth.
Always cut bite-sized pieces of food; it is impolite to take bites from a large chunk held on your fork.
Don't hold a forkful of food waiting in front you while you speak to someone.
When using a spoon for soup, dip it in away from you, and then sip from the side. Don't fill the spoon all the way, lest you spill some on the way to your mouth. Don't tip the bowl to the side and scrape the bottom to get the last mouthful, simply leave what you can't pick up elegantly. If broth or miso is served in a cup, eat a few spoonfuls at first, letting them cool as you pick them up; then when the whole has cooled sufficiently, you may drink from the cup.
When using a spoon to stir coffee or tea, remove it from the cup after use, and place on the saucer. Never use it to spoon up mouthfuls of the drink.
Finger Foods
Most foods should be eaten with cutlery, but there are some finger food exceptions.
Fruit, pickles, celery, small sandwiches, cookies, crackers and bread rolls etc are examples. Nothing gooey or greasy should be eaten with the fingers however.
Difficult Foods
Do not gnaw on bones; get all the meat you can off with your fork and then leave what remains.
Sandwiches may be eaten with both hands, but avoid sloppy or drippy ones when possible; the same goes for corn on the cob. Spaghetti may be eaten Italian style, twirled onto a fork, only if you can do it without making a mess. Otherwise, cut it with knife and fork.
The stones and seeds of fruit eaten with a spoon, such as stewed cherries, should be returned to the spoon from the lips as indiscreetly as possible. Olive pits, raw cherry pits, grapes peaches etc. may be dispelled into the fingers and placed on the bread and butter or desert plate.
Napkin
A small napkin should be opened completely and spread over the knee; a large one should be left folded in half across the knee. Do not snap it open by holding one corner and shaking, and do not use it like a mop while still folded up.
Use the napkin while eating to keep your mouth free of food particles and your fingers clean, but use it only on your fingertips, not on your whole hand like a cloth. Press it to your mouth before taking a sip from your glass so that you do not leave a greasy print on the rim.
When not in use, keep the napkin out of sight in your lap.
Never tuck it into your vest or shirt collar.
Serving Food
Food is always served from the left, and passed counterclockwise around the table.
Serving dishes should be presented with a fork and spoon for guests to help themselves. Do not keep the serving spoon at your place when you pass on the platter.
Do not pick over the food offered; take the item nearest to you.
Don't take more food than you can eat.
Leaving the Table
When you get up from the table, leave everything where it is (unless it is an informal dinner at a friend's house, where you should help to clear the table and clean up the meal.)
Don't stack dishes, and don't push them away from you.
The napkin should be left sitting on the table, to the left of your plate, not folded, but not crumpled in a ball.
Stand up carefully and quietly, and push your chair back in so that it's not in the way of others passing.
Thank the hostess or host for the meal and compliment anything which stood out particularly.
