For those who have lost a loved one, a funeral service is of extreme importance. Grief counselors will tell you that family and friends need a chance to get together to grieve for their loss and to share their love for and memories of the deceased. It is very comforting to the family to have the company and sympathy of friends and relatives, especially during the first few days.
The most appropriate expression of sympathy is the sending of funeral flowers. Even if the family has expressed a desire for financial contributions to their favorite charities, flowers should still be sent. Even though the death notice may read “in lieu of flowers,” flowers are always appropriate. Flowers help people express feelings that are difficult to express. Flowers show respect for the dead. They also add warmth to the service and provide visual support. They create a pleasant atmosphere making the mourners feel more comfortable. No matter what people say, no funeral service should be totally without flowers.
Flowers and greens have always played an important role in burial traditions. In ancient times family members used herbs to anoint the bodies of their loved ones, and they also held “wakes.” Family and friends would gather to guard the body. In some ancient cultures, “guarding the body” was necessary. In modern times the wake offers an opportunity for the grieving family to receive the condolences from friends and neighbors who might not be able to attend the actual funeral service or who might not get a chance to speak personally to the family members at the service. The wake also affords everyone an opportunity to view the flowers and read the enclosure cards.
It is important that all sympathy arrangements have enclosure cards and that all cards be filled out properly. The information should include a description of the arrangement and the complete name and address of the person who sent it. You will understand the importance of this if you ever have to send thank-you notes for sympathy arrangements. YES, IT IS PROPER TO SEND OUT THANK-YOU NOTES! I had that job several years ago when my uncle died. When I started looking through the enclosure cards, I found several from the same florist in Alabama that were not filled out. There was no name or address on the cards, and only the briefest description of the flowers. When I called the florist for help, her reply was “Well, I'm just too busy to fill out all those little cards. We don't do that here.” I assured her that I would not increase her work load. To this day if anyone wants me to recommend a florist in Montgomery, it will not be that florist.
As a florist, you should work closely with your clients to make sure the flowers are appropriate and designed to their satisfaction. You should also work closely with the funeral homes in your area to make sure your client's sad experience is as stress free as possible. You never want your client to be unhappy because the arrangement that was delivered is not what he ordered. You should know the rules and possible restrictions the funeral home or the cemetery might have. You should also be aware of the different cultural traditions and trends in customized tributes.
Customized tributes may reflect the personality of the deceased and may relate to his or her profession, favorite pastime, or hobby. For years, my father owned the 5 & 10 Cent Store in town, and when he died, the local florist created an arrangement depicting Daddy's store. She attached pieces of candy, toys, and other small items that he used to sell. The arrangement became a conversation piece for everyone who saw it, and it gave the mourners a chance to relive this important time in Dad's life. Daddy would have been proud.
You should talk to members of the family to find out about the deceased' interests. Was he an outdoorsman? A hunter? A sportsman? What was his favorite flowers or colors? Maybe he had a favorite hymn or Bible verse. Having this extra bit of information will allow you to better help people who order sympathy tributes. Anything you do that is special will certainly be appreciated by the family.
When ordering sympathy flowers, the client has many options. Some people like traditional arrangement, while others like trendy designs. Traditional tributes are always popular. There are many varieties of triangular designs, easel sprays, baskets, and potted plants. The traditional funeral flowers include carnations, roses, chrysanthemums, glads, and lilies. Customized arrangements may include mixed flowers for that fresh garden look, elegant bouquets of European flowers, or dramatic groupings of certain flower types. Baskets and potted plants can be taken home or donated to the church after the funeral. Silk flowers are becoming more popular also. The better quality silks are very realistic looking, and they last longer at the cemetery, especially if the weather is extremely cold or hot.
